Wait, do what now?
Wife wakes up in a panic and covers her head with her pillow, yelling.
Wife: "No, no, no, no! I don’t want to play! Seriously I’m not playing this game!"
Me: "what game do you think we are playing?"
Wife: "Well, I guess I can play for a little"
Me: "What are we playing?"
Wife: "The game with the cup. Where we have to put the guy in the cup. I don’t know. Right?"
Me: "What cup? What guy? I don’t see that here."
Wife: "I don’t know. The guy that we flip."
Wife: "Do you see that up there?"
Me: "See what?"
Wife: "That big green. It’s going to be, um, on the green there."
Me: "It’s green?"
Wife: "Yea. Big glob of snot and it’s gonna fall."
Wife: "I can’t even look anymore. Big snot. It’s gonna fall."
Girlfriend: "Who….whats in over there? Is he in there? What’s his name?"
Me: (bewildered at all of the random and sudden questions) "I think his name is Josh"
Girlfriend: "Is, who is the guy that’s above us in the replaceable. In there."
Me: "I have no idea"
Girlfriend: "That will be it. Sticky paws."
Girlfriend: "That will be your detective name. Sticky paws."
Wife: “Hey! What are you doing?!?” Me: “I’m reading and you’re having a nightmare” Wife: “No, I’m wide awake. Who is Jezma?” Me: “What?” Wife: “You just said you were Jezma” Me: “I did not” Wife: “Oh shit, I wish I recorded this. You thought you were Jezma and now you feel like a dumb dumb” Me: “Sure, let’s go with that”
Girlfriend wakes up abruptly, looks around the room….
Girlfriend: "Ok, don’t think I’m crazy. Do this…" She covers her face with her hands, as if she is hiding, but allows a small crack between her hands so she can look through.
Me: "I have absolutely no idea what the hell you are doing"
Girlfriend: "It’s just weird. When that stuff was moving. You just have to see it"
At this point all I could do was laugh. I had absolutely no response.
Wife: *mumbles franticly* "I don’t want to, don’t make me disappear!"
Me: "Why would I make you disappear?"
Wife: "I don’t know but no more. I don’t like it. Don’t make me disappear!"
Me: "Ok, I won’t make you disappear."
Fiance: "So anyone can have one but it’s not just me. See?"
Me: "Anyone can have what?"
Fiance: "Ok, are we really going to do this again?"
Fiance: "Do you not understand?"
Me: "No. Explain it to me"
Fiance: "Can’t I just tell you later?"
Me: "No, I’ll forget"
Fiance: "Ok, listen, Re-re. Anyone can get one, it’s a prize. It’s a candle, but not just me, anyone can have one. Ok?"
Girlfriend: *puts her arm under her pillow, lifts it up and partially sits up* *mumbles something about a rose*
Me: "What are you doing?!?"
Girlfriend: "I’m not doing it"
Me: (I am slightly concerned at this point). "What are you not doing?"
Girlfriend: "Oh, you know"
Me: "No, I don’t"
Girlfriend: "you know, capsizing"
Girlfriend: "I gotta go. My ship is sinking and I need my last beaths of air".
Me: *blink* *confused*
Girlfriend: "It’s my Titanic"
I….have no idea. She snapped out of it when she heard me gasping for my own air from laughing so hard.
Fiance: "I, I don’t like that. *points* The king is back there."
Fiance: "Because I’m going to sell him"
Me: "Why are you going to sell him?"
Fiance: "I don’t know. It’s genuinely like, what, what happened."
Fiance: *giggles* "But it’s not my problem."