Wait, do what now?
Girlfriend wakes up abruptly, looks around the room….
Girlfriend: "Ok, don’t think I’m crazy. Do this…" She covers her face with her hands, as if she is hiding, but allows a small crack between her hands so she can look through.
Me: "I have absolutely no idea what the hell you are doing"
Girlfriend: "It’s just weird. When that stuff was moving. You just have to see it"
At this point all I could do was laugh. I had absolutely no response.
Girlfriend: "That will be it. Sticky paws."
Girlfriend: "That will be your detective name. Sticky paws."
Girlfriend wakes up, freaks out and pulls the sheets up to her eyeballs….
GF: "Holy dear God. That was scary. Did you see that? I didn’t like it"
Me: "I didn’t see it. What was it?"
GF: "It was a huge bumble bee. It was trying to eat me and spit me back out"
Me: "What was the bee trying to do?"
GF: "It was trying to eat me and spit me back out"
Me: "It was trying to eat you and spit you back out?"
Me: "What, why?"
GF: "Because it’s mean and it wants to *garbled* at me"
Me: "I think you need to find new friends for bumble bees"
GF: "Yea probably."
My girlfriend wakes up, looks at me, points then says…
Girlfriend: "I think she will mow the sunshine."
Me: "The sunsine needs mowing again?"
She was asleep again before she could respond.
Fiance: "So anyone can have one but it’s not just me. See?"
Me: "Anyone can have what?"
Fiance: "Ok, are we really going to do this again?"
Fiance: "Do you not understand?"
Me: "No. Explain it to me"
Fiance: "Can’t I just tell you later?"
Me: "No, I’ll forget"
Fiance: "Ok, listen, Re-re. Anyone can get one, it’s a prize. It’s a candle, but not just me, anyone can have one. Ok?"
Girlfriend: Is stuff alive over there?
Girlfriend: *Leans over to look on my side of the bed* I just picked this up over there and it was alive. And then… I shut it….and put it over there.
Me: You did?
Girlfriend: Yes. And it had a baby. A bad baby. But, you know, not a real one.
Fiance: "Woa, woa, woa. What’s wrong with our ceiling?"
Me: *looks up*
Fiance: "It’s like, dripping down. Wait. Is it?"
Me: "I think I felt some ceiling drip on me"
Fiance: "That’s weird. It’s just weird"
Wife: "Hey. I moved over so you have more room in *mumbles*"
Me: "More room in what?"
Wife: "In the button area. You can have more room."
Me: "Why do I need more room?"
Wife: "I don’t know. But I thought you wanted more room for the buttons"
Fiance: *sits straight up in bed* "huh? Wait, how do I get out of here?"
Me: "The door."
Fiance: "That door that says no no?"
Me: "No, that’s the bathroom door."
Fiance: "But you said I could get out there."
Me: "No, you have to use the other door."
Fiance: "Oh. I’m so confused. I can’t get out of here."
Girlfriend: *pointing at the ceiling and moving her finger as if she is following something* "Did, did you see that?"
Girlfriend: "Ok, I didn’t make this up. It was red, and it was like hanging down, and then it got sucked up, and then it disappeared."
Girlfriend: "Wait. And now it sounds really stupid"
Me: *more laughing*
Girlfriend: "I gotta go" *mumbles something*
Girlfriend: "Don’t worry about it. Just ignore me"