Posts tagged sleep talking

Girlfriend: "That will be it. Sticky paws."
Me: "What?!"
Girlfriend: "That will be your detective name. Sticky paws."

Wife: "What? MOM!?!"
Me: "She’s not here."
Wife: "Oh. I’m worried about the pony"
Me: "What pony?"
Wife: "The pony. Coming out of the cage."
Me: "When did you get a pony?"
Wife: *asleep*

Wife: "It’s pool"
Me: "What’s pool?"
Wife: "It’s *mumbles* a pool. But not not not. Um, not swimming pool"
Me: "Not a swimming pool?"
Wife: "No. Ok?"
Me: "Ok."

Fiance: *mumbling* "If I had a suit"
Me: "A what?"
Fiance: *pointing randomly at the ceiling* "I could get up there if I had a soup, er, shoot, suit. On the shelf"
Me: "An elf on the shelf?"
Fiance: "No, dummy, suit on shelf."
And she’s out again.

Wife: "Do you see that up there?"
Me: "See what?"
Wife: "That big green. It’s going to be, um, on the green there."
Me: "It’s green?"
Wife: "Yea. Big glob of snot and it’s gonna fall."
Me: "Snot?"
Wife: "I can’t even look anymore. Big snot. It’s gonna fall."

Wife: "Oh, they *mumble* the coupons."
Me: "What coupons?"
Wife: "I don’t know."
Me: "I don’t either."

Fiance: "Uh, what’s he doing?"
Me: "Nothing"
Fiance: "Yea he is"
Me: "He’s walking his dog"
Fiance: "Oh. Upside down?"
Me: "Yep."
Fiance: "Oh. hah."

Fiance: "I hope you don’t mind. I moved the bed"
Me: "you did?" (The bed was not moved at all.)
Fiance: "yea. I used that thing where there is 4 instead of 3. And you tie it at the top."
Me: "It’s kind of cold in here"
Fiance: "Lay down and you’ll get warm, then you will be cold"
Me: "Is that how it works?"
Fiance: *asleep again*

Fiance: "Hey?!? Are you ok?!?"
Me: *confused* "yes"
Fiance: "Are you sure?! You said you were doomed!"
Me: "No, that was a cough."
Fiance: *starting to wake up* "wait….."

Wife: "Woa! That’s beautiful! Where did you get that?"
Me: "Get what?"
Wife: "That picture! Do you see it?"
Me: "I sure do."
Wife: "Do you have it? It’s over there, I can see it."
Me: "No I don’t think so."
Wife: "Oh. Ok."